23 • 02 • 17

Today, I say goodbye to everyone and everything I have known.

Today, I hope my misery ends.

Today, tears will be shed.

But in the future, the sun will shine brighter than it has ever shone, for the sake of everybody else.

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22 • 02 • 17

I have so many things to say, so much to tell, but when I sit and try to write my thoughts down, I can’t. My mind loses focus and I get overwhelmed. I guess I will try to say whatever I can before biding my final goodbye.

Love him, but give him his space. Respect him, but he is not your master. Trust him, but do not be a fool. Talk to him, but do not burden him. Make him happy, but remember to make yourself happy as well.

Love your family, because they are the closest to you. Treat them often. Show them you appreciate them. Honor them. Respect them. Help them.

And you, always remember that words will never be enough. To show someone you truly mean something, do it. Be patient with others, because you never know the full story. If you say that you’re here to stay, be there. Do not disappear and get upset when no one trusts your words. They became insecure because of what you have done, but they still trust you, or they would have left you. Not everyone is going to share everything no matter how close you are, so do not force them. Care for them instead but respect their space. Relationships are not always about similarities. To think that you must find someone your style is foolish. It is about understanding and the effort to make it work. If you do not like exercising but he/she does, go with them. You will learn to like the things they love as well.

I wish I had done this earlier. If I had, I would have never been in this situation. But now that I am, I will do what I need to.

20 • 02 • 17

I thought I was finally prepared to leave the earth without tears. I was wrong.

 

Today, my after school hours was spent reading posts on the various makeup groups I’m in on Facebook. A post caught my attention. Someone was asking for advice on what to do when your friends ignore you because you are in a relationship and I gave her some advice. A completely different girl comes and says ‘You broke up with him didn’t you?’ and proceeds to rant about how I should not treat best friends that way when she has absolutely no idea how I have been treated by my ‘best friend’. Sensing a potential drama evolving, I deleted the comment and reposted my original comment, intending to solely help and not cause trouble. Several minutes later, my phone lit up with a message. I received a hate message. She called me a sad ass and said no wonder my boyfriend left me, then proceeded to block me.

 

I never recovered from the blow dealt to me when he left, and to have it picked on was way more than what I could handle. To be accused and insulted was too much for me. It hurt so much and I wish I wasn’t alive.

 

Please be careful before you speak. Just because you have never gone through a similar situation does not give you any right to criticize and insult someone. I just wish people would be more thoughtful and kind the way they expect others to be.